March
16, 2004
Robert, Mark, Keith, Gale and other friends everywhere who help
in this battle.
Last night after I posted the last message on recruiting, I
had a seizure for the first time in my life in what was
diagnosed at my local ER as a result of a severe migraine
headache.
See, I live about 60 miles from VA Houston Hospital. Last
night I begin to loose the ability to breath, the headache came
on suddenly in such a way that it began to make me sick all over
in the upper chest area and in the head. I thought I was having
a real big heart attack. I did not think I would be able to make
the drive down to the VA so I went to emergency room at the
local hospital.
I was convulsing and shaking all over, even my teeth were
hurting, blood pressure was 190 over 145 when I got there, my
normal is 120 over 75, pulse was way up, my eyes were going
dark.
They ran a bunch of tests including a cat scan. The doctor
came in to tell me I was having a very severe migraine and that
my symptoms along with other tests revealed by body was going
into shock over the pain.
They shot me up with pain killer through IV and it did not
even touch the pain, she then ordered a real strong dose which
knocked me out for about 5 minutes, when I came to I could
barely feel my body and the headache was still there but the
sting was gone.
When we left the ER the hospital handed me a bill for over
$2000 and said other bills would follow for Doctors and others
as well.
I cannot help to think the love of money is behind such
outrageous medical costs. In light that I was only in the ER
about four hours.
On the way to the hospital it felt like the life was coming
out of my body and I was dying. I have never in my life felt
this way, but I can say in the last year or so I have felt like
if my symptoms increase I would not live very long. I have a
high tolerance of pain, but these days the pain has so increased
I cant take it any more. I find my mental faculties and my
reasoning ability escaping me.
I have barely enough strength to type this but I felt I
should say what is on my heart as I react to what I read on this
BB everyday I log on.
I believe in a creator and have sought Him my whole life. I
have asked all the questions others have asked and learned much
truth about studying His words both in English translations and
in Hebrew, Aramaic and Greek, as well as experiencing the joys
and sorrows of living on this planet.
So after some 35 years of research and 40 years of life what
conclusion have I come to involves love and hate regarding this
world.
I would define the world as a word which represents all that
is bad which humans who walk on this planet as the soil or sod
do to others.
Well I believe I cannot answer why people choose evil rather
than good since good is so much more powerful than evil. But yet
it is true people choose evil and in the course of this,
consequences from their actions hurt others.
Without diving into what, how, why this current war in Iraq
is going on, people are getting hurt. Look at the war we fought
over 13 years ago, look at how it has hurt us, how it has hurt
and affected others who care about these things, and how many of
those who did not fight in that war still spend their time to
care and exhibit those emotions by doing something to either fix
the problem or help deal with the pain by bringing relief to
those who suffer.
No question we are real people with real emotions, with real
pain, and that are real people with genuine care and concern who
can and do make a difference shows love.
I said all that and what else I have left to say by stating
that based upon the power I feel in the words I read on this
bulletin board which are in a small way a large voice about how
love works, I am affected in a positive way.
I am affected because I can relate to how others feel, and I
can benefit from others who care like Gale, Robert, and so many
whose names escape my memory but deserve recognition, but remain
to be named whenever I am lifted by their efforts to help me out
according to the posts they make herein and elsewhere, but not
only them to, but others everywhere as well.
I mean, who really wants people to suffer, who wants people
in pain? Obviously the scriptures speak about the love of money,
not money itself, but the love of it is the root of all evil.
Pain is an obvious result of people who love money, that is
people who will do whatever they can to make money, even if it
hurts others.
I wish now to shift gears away from that what is negative and
show how the words, and deeds of those on this bulletin board,
and others all over this land, who bring good to those who
suffer in spite of what evil brings so much pain.
The first commandment states to love The Father with all
heart mind and soul and the second is to love one's neighbor as
one's self.
But the question then remains how to love and who is thy
neighbor?
How to love the Father is not easy in a world of evil which
brings pain to so many lives, a world which He created. Pain has
a way of driving out love, no question about it. Then why the
creation, if it has the potential to bring such pain?
So many years I have asked that question and here is the only
answer I have ever been able to come up with. Love feels good
and pain hurts.
Humans would never be able to feel love or pain if they were
not created. Well then why were humans created with emotions
which could feel? I don't have the answer to that one yet. But I
do know if we choose to love others we escape pain ourselves.
Another way of saying this is that in all the studies I have
conducted in scripture I have found an underlying theme, love
represents what is good, and evil what is bad. The actions of
love represent selfless service to others, and evil represent
self service.
There is some hidden miracle in the act of helping others
which affects our feelings in a good way, a feel good way.
The love of money is rooted in the philosophy that if one can
gather enough money they can buy that which will make them feel
good. Hollywood is a god example about how this philosophy is a
failure. Actors reap in millions of dollars for such a small
effort in regards to actual labour, but it is clear from the
divorces, drug addiction, and other results of the profits the
money is simply not buying happiness.
Politicians have been fleecing the tax payers since the beginning
of time, and taking the revenues and redirecting them for their
own bank accounts and the bank accounts of their friends.
Remember the old cliché "it is not what you know but who
you know".
Our county is a perfect example of this. The prescription
drug industry and the DoD budget are enough to prove it without
a shadow of a doubt.
Reaching out helping others is the epitome of love. Those who
love deserve mercy. Love is a choice, I have learned this much
on life. The more we love the more our character changes into
what love is.
Even those who fall prey to the love of money and hurt others
deserve mercy, but this is not easy to say or give when one is
on the receiving end of the pain.
Mercy is a big word which brings thoughts of who and how they
deserve it.
I think the answer is found in the second commandment. Those
who are willing to follow the second commandment according to
scripture are those who will receive that mercy, not only from
their Creator, but from their neighbor. The others will perish
in their greed. The others will never see the love which can
bring that which truly feels good, that feel good that money
cannot touch.
I remember when Howard Hughes died, I think at that time he
was the richest man in the world. In the world that is, not on
this planet. The word rich can also mean someone who has wealth
in other ways. Wealth as in friendship and love. Rich in friends
and love. So there is no doubt there are people in this world
who live on this planet who are rich in love, and rich in
happiness, while they have very little if any money.
For those who do not believe in the Creator, still the
principle of loving thy neihbor stands to benefit them as well
because the happiness surfaces when people love one another
instead of try to hurt one another.
This bulletin board has been an avenue of help and not hurt,
an avenue of friendship which reveals how rich those who spend
their time on here helping others, are.
The word neighbor is a bit vague in the English setting in
that we generally think the word to mean someone who lives next
door to us, or even a neighboring country. Neighbor is also been
known to represent a friendly gesture when expressed in terms of
a greeting to someone like a stranger who we cross paths with,
which gesture "hello friend" has the ability to set a
setting of peace.
This translation says:
Mt 22:39 And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy
neighbour as thyself.
Neighbour is Greek for "Plesion" with a meaning
like this- a neighbour
a friend any other person, and where two are concerned, the
other (thy fellow man, thy neighbour), any member of the Hebrew
nation and commonwealth according to Christ (anointed), any
other man irrespective of nation or religion with whom we live
or whom we chance to meet.
So the command represents not just words but actions towards
others, of course most everyone assumes this.
In the Hebrew, it simply means Shaken (shaw-kane'); Adjective
inhabitant, neighbour
So the Hebrew word inhabitant has great and profound meaning
to it historically, in that it represents habitants who live
near one another.
Given evil in this world it is safe to assume that one would
not inhabit next to evil, but would inhabit next to a friend.
This bulletin board has given me the opportunity to inhabit
next to peace, friends, and those who care.
Friendship has a far reaching definition in that it
represents someone with certain characters which reflect
behaviors according to actions which represent the actions of
good things towards other people in a friendship setting. The
scope is simple, peace, love, and care all wrapped up in an
action which others can feel, and feel it they do in a good way.
Now it is obvious from the characteristics that the VA
exhibit, that would be those humans in the VA which make the
rules and bring forth the procedures which are so injurious to
all Veterans, that one, Veterans would probably not consider
those folks as someone they would inhabit next to, someone who
has not the characteristics of a friend, certainly not having
the behavior of one either, second, it is clear the VA desires
not to have peace with those who it serves. Certainly not
showing any love either.
So then where is the buffer in all this where Veterans can go
and get relief?
It is found in the actions of those who exhibit inhabitable,
peaceable, and loving kindness towards others.
This is what is reflective of the second commandment. Love
not hurt.
This bulletin board I have found to represent that. I don't
find people on hear out to hurt me, but to help, even if the
help is nothing more than a few words in response to a post.
It is found in the pictures posted, the revisit of articles
posted on the news, studies, concern for others, suffering which
is spoke about, the defeats and failures shared, the triumphs
and even the fight which other Veterans put up against the ill
tactics of the VA.
Yet all these things represent what people, real people are
doing. It is like being in the fox hole with someone who is
willing to fight, when I read the posts on this BB, and even
other posts on other BB and in the news as well which capture
the issues which surround our lives.
Loving your neighbor is really a simple thing to do. I find
this love in some of the simple words posted here. Even the long
well documented researched articles exhibit this love for one's
neighbor.
Why else would someone post articles which help others?
Robert is a MD, yet he has never examined me, nor have I ever
sought what special medical care he is trained for. His words,
his posts, have treated my injury and illness in ways which show
he desires not only to be a good neighbor, but reflects the
scriptural aspect of love in the carefully selected words and
articles which bring hope.
It is obvious he cares to take the time to make such posts,
but also his actions show he is concerned about all of our well
beings in a way which prove the love the second commandment
speaks about.
A Great loving man once said-
Matthew 5:10 Blessed are they which are persecuted for
righteousness' sake: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
The term "persecuted for righteousness sake" is
sometimes hard to understand.
I certainly believe that those who stepped up to the plate
and volunteered to maintain our freedom as a nation in the
military, regardless of the reason, those who expend their
efforts to bring healing in whatever way they can to those who
suffer from illness and injury due to the adverse nature of
defending such freedom on battlefields, represent the type of
inhabitants scripture speaks about in terms of righteous.
They represent the example of what love is commanded to be
expressed towards neighbors..
In the efforts of these people obvious persecution is bound
to happen. Not only is it bound we see it happening every day we
Veterans, and others who stand with us, must deal with the VA
and even Americans who could care less about us.
In reality the VA represents the attitude which Americans
exhibit to others. If Americans everywhere really cared they
would put a stop the VA just like when someone decides to stop
payment on a check, they go down to the bank and fill out the
necessary paperwork and make it so.
Blessed is another word sometimes hard to understand, but I
think the people on here are blessed, blessed in a way where
what they have chosen to do in life has been honorable in such a
way as to reflect the choices they have made to serve for a
cause, and then suffer from it.
What is striking about this group is that their choice to
serve and those others choice to help those who served reveals
their true love, their inhabitability, true characteristics, truly
blessed.
These folks herein have stepped up to the plate and said I
will serve no matter the costs, for the benefit of others.
Is not this true love? The is this not also the example of
those who suffer for righteosness sake?
What we have all done is righteous. It is right and not
wrong.
Your choice to choose right provides power to me to press on
and keep fighting evil.
Their certainly is power in numbers, even if the numbers are
few.
Good always defeats evil. Sometimes it takes time, but it
defeats it.
The term soldier to me represents someone who is willing to
make a fight for what is right, even if they stand in the valley
of the shadow of death alone, the very power they have within
themselves to fight for what is right will bring them all the
good they can ever ask for.
I believe that, and I believe that if we stand together and
love one another and make our homes into homes which are places
others would like to inhabit next to, and be neighbors who are
there to help one another out, not even the VA, in all it's
behmoth size, can bring us down.
United we stand remember divided we fall.
I am thankful to be untied with those who have decided to
stand for what is right, it makes me feel good inside to be
inhabited with people like that.
At the end of the day I know I joined to serve my country to maintain
it's freedom. Now I wake up to see I am gathered together with
others who have done the same in whatever way they have chosen.
Whatever valley we find ourselves in which shadow of death is
cast upon us will only be chased away by what good we do for one
another. This good which is done for me from people like you, is
what strength I feel inside to press on.
I think that is the definition of love. Love provides
unmeasurable power for people to press on.
I will close and say the people on this bulletin board have
provided me with power they can never know they had. Their words
have provided me some joy.
I would be remiss not add one last proposition. What then
does the term American mean in all this and where does it fit
in?
Well I am sure volumes could be written about this subject.
But I can say that America represents the posts, the words,
the articles, the stories, the failures, the triumphs, the deeds
of those on here, it is what makes people who stand against us
with the shadow of death known as failures and those who stand
for what right is and suffer from it's battle arduously;
What is called friend, neighbor, what is known as peace,
inhabitable, what is good and what is love, what is blessed.
What is called and known as American.
