ONE- I started out with nothing, and I still have most of it left.

 TWO- My wild oats have turned into All Bran.

 THREE- I finally got my head together; now my Body is falling apart.

 FOUR- Funny, I don't remember being absent minded...

 FIVE- All reports are in; life is now officially unfair.

 SIX- If all is not lost, where is it?

 SEVEN- It is easier to get older than it is to get wiser.

 EIGHT- Some days you're the dog; some days you're the hydrant.

 NINE- I wish the buck stopped here; I sure could use a few...

 TEN- Kids in the back seat cause accidents.

 ELEVEN- Accidents in the back seat cause...kids.

 TWELVE- It's hard to make a comeback when you haven't been anywhere.

 THIRTEEN- The only time the world beats a path to your door is when
 you're in the bathroom.

 FOURTEEN- If God wanted me to touch my toes, he would have put them on my knees.

 FIFTEEN- When I'm finally holding all the cards, why does everyone decide to play chess?

 SIXTEEN- It's not hard to meet expenses... they're everywhere.

 SEVENTEEN- The only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth.

 EIGHTEEN- These days, I spend a lot of time thinking about the here
 after...
 I go somewhere to get something and then wonder what I'm here after.

 NINETEEN - 

I AM UNABLE TO REMEMBER IF I HAVE MAILED THIS TO YOU BEFORE OR NOT.

       THIS IS SOME GOOD ADVICE!
       

 If a dog was the teacher you would learn stuff like:
        

• When loved ones come home, always run to greet them.

• Never pass up the opportunity to go for a joyride.

• Allow the experience of fresh air and the wind in your face to be pure ecstasy.

• When it's in your best interest, practice obedience.

•  Let others know when they've invaded your territory.

• Take naps.

• Stretch before rising       

• Run, romp, and play daily

• Thrive on attention and let people touch you

• Avoid biting when a simple growl will do.

• On warm days, stop to lie on your back on the grass

• On hot days, drink lots of water and lie under a shady tree.

• When you're happy, dance around and wag your entire body.

• No matter how often you're scolded, don't buy into the guilt thing
         and pout...run right back and make friends.

• Delight in the simple joy of a long walk

• Eat with gusto and enthusiasm.  Stop when you have had enough

• Be loyal. Never pretend to be something you're not.

• If what you want lies buried, dig until you find it

• When someone is having a bad day, be silent, sit close by and nuzzle them gently.

we'd all do well to learn from those "best traits" from those around us, even if they are animals

        I AM THANKFUL FOR TOO MUCH E-MAIL BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE FRIENDS WHO ARE THINKING OF ME.

        SEND THIS TO PEOPLE YOU CARE ABOUT. . I JUST DID!

How much is that doggie?